Closing

As the year draws to a close
i can't help but feel a lil pensive inside
the little small me inside
the tough exterior that is seemingly cold
seemingly the little monkey that jumps around
that laughs so loudly
without a care in the world
the confident me
the weak me

i recall last year's resolutions
for (1) a driving license and
(2) more savings

well, as a closing i say i am happy to have gotten my license
at least something i achieved
through much pain and tenacity

although bad memories also aplenty,
i was set back a very few K dollars by my story with Andrew
because of the bloody FUCKER WILLIAM SOH of M5 Concepts
someone as low as to use feelings and weakness for his own monetary advantages

he caused my breakup
the incident costed Andrew at least 20K
no i am not making it up
his company is around
advertised in Teenage dec '05
"his" company at 11AA mhd sultan road
is not under his name
is under one of the young "followers" who is decieved by him
that they will make it big one day (why? go figure)
the outlet, isnt paid by M5
was paid by Andrew
who was stupid

Anyone who thinks they can make it big with m5 must be pretty dumb
to get fooled by him
too bad i just insulted myself
to have gotten involved, than again for andrew
than again causing my own misery

as 2005 draws to a close
there is alot i am thankful for

i am thankful to Edison,
my mortal for being there the months i broke down
the months i cried
the months which i lost myself
and though it also caused some friction between us
(sorry edi i lost control)
i wana say edi, i am here for u
am always ur angel.
our frenship is for a lifetime.

i am thankful that i gained a really close fren Marcus
and also the 2nd Ray, Hong Rui for being there

not forgetting my bro, Roy for proving to me frenship transcends everything
every argument, misunderstanding and misjudgment.

I am thankful that i got over 1 very pain in the neck year in ns
i am thankful for my memories on board the dragon boat with FLUS team
i am thankful that things are ok between me and most people (guess better not to mention)

a pretty good year for me
guessed i grew alot
i realised alot
i learnt the hard way

life isnt easy
in fact its real crappy
i wana break outta this metamorphsis cycle
how much more do i have to go through?
or i guess, it doesnt end
it just keeps getting better

there are people i havent met frequently
but have also always been around
Dom, nixon, stuart, ken... not forgetting my buddies angela and andy

so much to say
but im lost for words

and i am indeed lost


andrew came back
the one person in my life
in which i seriously thought he was the one
the first time
the last time?
but no
it wasnt so
never like the movies
never like u want it to be

its been 2weeks
its been so hard
i believe on both of us
he meant alot
does it mean when i cry now he still means alot?
but than again
its so scary
im off balance
im awake but unconscious
im in control but without direction
im 20 but i guess im not mature enough

let there be light
let there be snow this xmas
let there be fireworks on new years eve
let there be losta presents and happy faces
let there be a happy me
let there be a happy december

as a closing..